2. HOPE

           

In the 9th Year of his presidency, President Barack Hussein Obama attempted to inspire the remains of the nation by developing the ability to detach his head from his body.

The Republicans unanimously decried this move as un-Christian sorcery, but supporters rallied around Obama’s disembodied, levitating head as a beacon of HOPE in dark times.

                  

 

“He speaks in your voice, American, and there's a shine in his eye that's halfway hopeful.”

Don Delillo, Underworld

 

“It’s…the hope of a skinny kid with a funny name who believes that America has a place for him, too. The audacity of hope!”

Barack Obama, campaign speech